“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.” Proverbs 31:25

She is clothed with STRENGTH

From the beginning of time humans have treated women as the weaker sex, pushed a societal belief that we are less than men, we are barely human. We are called “weak” because of something we were born with, something that is completely out of our control. Not only men say these things, but society has trained us so well that women are calling other women weak as well.

So ingrained in us, we don’t even realize that we are doing it. We shut each other down, refuse to talk about certain things because they’re “icky”. Men can talk openly about their penises without reprimand, yet we say the word “period” and are completely shunned.

In movies and television Hollywood labels “strong female characters” as the women on screen who are behaving like men, or who stand up for themselves, who fight for their place in the world. This phrase, “Strong female character” bothers me so much!!

Don’t get me wrong I love the influence these women have on society, and the strength it gives to other women. The thing that bothers me is that saying “strong female character” implies that there is such thing as a “weak female character”.

Let me say this once….. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A WEAK WOMAN!!!

We are ALL strong!! Every single woman on this planet is so incredibly amazingly STRONG simply by living!!

The unspeakable

What makes all of us strong? Okay let me paint a picture for you of some things EVERY woman deals with (whether you recognize it, or even know you’re going through it or not):

1. Periods

Yes I said it! Every month, every woman has a period. Now I could go into scientific biological detail about how and why this happens, but it doesn’t matter. The point is that women have something physical that happens to their body every month that we have NO CONTROL over. So every month we have blood and pieces of flesh pouring out of our bodies without our control. With the downpour of blood comes cramps. Our muscles are contracting every second and its so incredibly painful! Along with cramps comes mood swings, excessive sweating, headaches, hot flashes, back pain, tender and swollen breasts, bloating, constipation, diarrhea, increased appetite, decreased appetite, and many other symptoms. This is just what an average woman experiences.

And you know what? While we experience all of this, while we’re doubled over in pain, wearing diapers, or shoving something up our vagina, bleeding for hours, we still have to go about our regular day!

Did you know that the woman sitting next to you at the office is in excruciating pain? Probably not because we have learned how to work through our pain and deal with it so we don’t miss days of work because of something we can’t control. Last week I worked two 5 hour shifts between two jobs while having HORRIBLE cramps and light-headedness. But I dealt with it, because I needed money, and its taboo for me to call out sick when I’m just having cramps.

This shouldn’t be the case. I should feel safe calling in for something that does in fact make me sick. Ladies listen up…….

YOU ARE NOT WEAK FOR TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF!

2.   Taking care of others over ourselves

For centuries it has been the woman’s “job” to take care of the household. That means that she is constantly thinking of others needs before her own, sometimes not tending so some very important things because the children, or her friends, or her boyfriend, or her family come first. So often women are working while they’re very sick simply because she is afraid of calling in sick, afraid that she’ll be seen as selfish or not doing her job, because her entire life is about serving others.

Ladies, it is OKAY to take care of yourself! If you have the stomach flu, or a migraine, or just horrible cramps, it is okay to say “no” to society’s opinion of you, and take care of yourself! If you don’t want to hang out with your friends and just be alone instead, THAT’S OKAY!! It does not make you weak, it makes you strong!

3. Constant fear

Violence against women is astonishingly high and it has put women in a perpetual state of fear. We hold our keys between our fingers so we can stab someone in case we get jumped. We see a man standing in our path and we start to panic thinking that he could attack us. We do the bad guy check before getting in the car, making sure no one is hiding under the car or inside. We walk quickly and always keep our head up so we don’t miss anything. When we go on dates we text our girlfriends with our location and time, a photo of the guy, and make sure to call them on our way home so if they don’t hear from us they know where to look first and who to look for.

It has surprised me so much how many women in my life have experienced violence at some point in their life. We live in a world that is extremely hostile to women, but that does not make women weak, it actually makes us strong! Because we have learned how to fight for ourselves since a young age! Not that it’s okay that this is the reason we were made strong, but it still makes us strong either way.

Just the way you are

Women YOU ARE STRONG and FIERCE and I want you to know right now that you don’t have to change anything about yourself. You are perfect just the way you are! Everything you have experienced has made you strong! Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise!

There is no such thing as a weak woman! We are all strong!

Everything you are doing is leading you in the right direction! Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and straighten your crown!

YOU ARE A QUEEN!